Spam King Escapes From Federal Prison 596
Bobfrankly1 writes "The FBI, IRS, and the Rocky Mountain Safe Streets Task Force are helping the US Marshals search for escaped 'Spam King' Edward 'Eddie' Davidson. He apparently jumped in a car with his wife, changed clothes at home, and hasn't been seen since." Update: 07/24 22:20 GMT by T : It seems that Davidson has been found, victim of a murder-suicide which also left two others dead.
If only (Score:5, Funny)
;-)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Here on Slashdot, a Wife is at the very least a mythical creature like a Gorgon or a Chimera, if not an actual Deity. Capitalization is required.
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
I think you're thinking of Digg ...
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Informative)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Insightful)
Here on Slashdot, a Wife is at the very least a mythical creature like a Gorgon or a Chimera, if not an actual Deity. Capitalization is required.
I love my wife dearly. I really do.
But if you're equating wives to deities in the sense that they're mystical infallible ideal beings, it's very clear that you're either unmarried or a newlywed. If you're comparing them to immensely powerful beings whose will dictates all that happens around them with no regard to the consequences and around whom all within their realm must quiver before and do their bidding or fear their wrath, I suspect you've been over to my place to visit.
[I'm kidding - she's really sweet. If you're reading this, Hon, it was a joke. Really. OK... I'll pull out the couch...]
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
But if you're equating wives to deities in the sense that they're mystical infallible ideal beings
Is it odd that I read "inflatable" rather than infallible?
Re:Editors (Score:4, Funny)
Here on Slashdot, a Wife is at the very least a mythical creature like a Gorgon or a Chimera
Hey, even mythical creatures [giantitp.com] can have problems relating to the fairer sex.
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Expect him to talk tough to you too since Internet should be capitalized. (douchebag)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Editors (Score:5, Funny)
Cue the 400 posts arguing whether or not "Internet" should be capitalized.
1 Internet = 8 internets
Re:Editors (Score:4, Informative)
Why exactly does what Wired decides to do make it applicable to the rest of us?
Internet = the whole enchilada - the "cloud", if you will.
internet = any group of networks
He is innocent! (Score:5, Funny)
The one-armed man did it!
His "inbox"... (Score:5, Funny)
Soon to be crammed full of unsolicited MALE. Once they catch him and send him off to REAL prison!
What a maroon! He get's sent to the country club you aren't allowed to leave for a less than 2 year vacation and he ESCAPES? He's gonna get EXACTLY what he deserves now.
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:5, Funny)
Samir: They do?
Michael Bolton: Shit. I'm a free man and I haven't had a conjugal visit in six months.
Samir: I have a question.
Peter Gibbons: Yes?
Samir: In... in these conjugal visits, you can have sex with women?
Peter Gibbons: Yep, you sure can.
Samir: OK, I'll do it.
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:5, Funny)
Wouldn't that be his "outbox"?
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:5, Insightful)
Not anymore.
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:5, Insightful)
Well, if they made a fuss about spam and caught him then, imagine how they will react to him escaping a federal prision (no matter how lenient the punishment was).
He is in for a baad life. However, no intelligent wife-of-a-delinquent rescues his husband without some sort of financial plan. I bet the guy has a million or two stashed somewhere.
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:4, Informative)
I'm pretty sure that escaping is a felony. He's now enough of a priority.
His wife will likely also be facing jail time for this since from the description, it sounds like she assisted him in his escape. That, too, is a crime. Possibly more than one.
Cheers
Re:His "inbox"... (Score:5, Funny)
if understand($POPCULTUREREFERENCE)==FAIL {
postobnoxioustroll(slashdot.org);
feelsmug();
checkpostreplies(slashdot.org);
noticedupe(http://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=624513&cid=24319179);
noticefail(http://it.slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=624513&cid=24320141);
stopsmug();
feelshitty();
return(1);
}
Re:He is innocent! (Score:5, Funny)
The one-armed man did it!
Since his crime involved the Internet, it was more likely the one-hand-free man.
The FBI press release (Score:5, Informative)
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:The FBI press release (Score:4, Insightful)
That's assuming they catch him. If they do, he won't be able to walk away because it won't be minimum security. He'll be found guilty of additional crimes, and his wife (if caught) will be sent to prison as well.
They're probably both in Mexico by now.
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Funny)
From the press release:
On April 28, 2008, Davidson was sentenced by U.S. District Court Judge Marcia S. Krieger to serve 21 months (just under 2 years) in federal prison.
I'm sure glad they did that math for me. o_O
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Funny)
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Funny)
Maybe it's for the benfit of the Yurpeans. I here they have metric time over there.
Yup - We just recently converted. 10-hour days, 10-day weeks, 10-week months, and 10-month years. Sure is funny weather we're having this Winter...
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Funny)
>>Sure is funny weather we're having this Winter...
I think you meant Wintre.
-b
Re:The FBI press release (Score:5, Funny)
On the next Prison Break... (Score:5, Funny)
Incoming! (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Incoming! (Score:4, Funny)
Clothes? (Score:5, Funny)
I thought that changing clothes only worked if your wanted level was 2 stars.
Re:Clothes? (Score:5, Funny)
I thought that changing clothes only worked if your wanted level was 2 stars.
And the FBI doesn't start chasing you til 5 stars! WTF!
What to do next? (Score:5, Interesting)
Really, really bad move. Now, instead of two years at summer camp, he will go to many more years of Federal Pound-me-in-the-a$$ Prison. It is really, really hard in today's day and age to avoid being captured, even with a lot of money if you want to live at some decent level. His best bet I think is to go to a foreign country where he could blend in, and live inconspicuously.
Even in some place like Mexico he would be quite a stand out if he flashed cash, and in the US you'd ultimately fall temptation to going to the local drugstore and risk being nabbed on camera. Any lawyers know if there are any countries which would absolutely refuse extradition? If so, he would still need to 1) get there and 2) transfer enough money to survive, and much more if he couldn't work.
Interestingly enough, I think the next play depends on how many resources the US government will put into capturing him and raising awareness among people. A stint on "Dateline" or widely watched / read program would help any possible acquaintances turn him in.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
Nah, Arrested Development taught me that you can escape as many times as you want, and they'll eventually let you go home with an ankle bracelet.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Interesting)
Wrong direction of cash flow (Score:5, Funny)
I heard that he is about to recieve eleventy jillion dollars from a Nigerian prince.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
If we're assuming archetypal prison behavior, wouldn't it be his outbox that gets stuffed?
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
He'll probably also have plenty of male in his outbox.
yeah (Score:5, Insightful)
Nothing quite as funny as gay prison rape.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
Really, really bad move. Now, instead of two years at summer camp, he will go to many more years of Federal Pound-me-in-the-a$$ Prison.
Spammers are not known for taking the long view and doing the right thing.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
Dearest,
I greet you in the name of God.I also want to sincerely apologies for and discomfort or embarrassment may cause you.As I am quite sure that you will be surprise to receive this message from me, i got your email address contact after a critical search for someone reliable with a good heart with whom i will be able to transact business with. I am spiritually assured that you will be capable of assisting me,this is why i have taken this step to contact you and hopefully get your attention to assist me in a certain business transaction that will be of benefit to you and I.
My name is Edward Davidson and I have substantial funds and assets to a value of US$ 1 billion within the United States of America that I need to have transferred out of the country in the form of cash or other high-value items. Please send an email to eddie@spamk1ng.org if you are interested in helping me. You will get a share of 30 percent if you are successful in helping me with this!
Please keep this confidential!
Re:What to do next? (Score:4, Interesting)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Interesting)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
Prison rape is a serious problem in the United States, where over 2.1 million people are incarcerated. Depending on the statistics you believe [wikipedia.org], there are more men raped in prison then women are raped outside of prison. And it is not the "real" criminals who are the victims. For example, a 17-year-old boy was gang-raped in prison [nytimes.com] after he robbed a guy with a toy gun. Sure, the robbery was a stupid thing to do, but our society punished him by putting him in jail, not to have him gang-raped. Victims of gang-rape risk getting STDs including HIV, which effectively renders a prison sentence for forging a check into a death sentence. Our nation's drug laws have placed many in jail for relatively small crimes. These people are in danger of being raped.
Only people in the United States think it is funny that prisoners are being raped. Prison guards and administrators do not care about this problem, and it is unconstitutionally cruel to allow this to happen. I am not a softie liberal; on the contrary, I believe in the strict letter of the law. We sentence people to jail, or to die. We do not sentence them to get gang-raped for the rest of their lives. (Believe me, I'd be all in favor of getting the real criminals who rape and murder others to be raped themselves for the rest of their lives, but quite expectedly, it is those people who are doing the raping in prison.)
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
Wish I had mod points.
It's one of the sickest little bits of our culture that prison rape jokes aren't considered offensive.
I mean, I still make them, but I make rape jokes in general, and am occasionally considered an ass for it. Your grandma can make a "guy gets raped in prison" joke on the morning news and no one would get offended.
There are multiple cases where a man sentenced for non-violent crimes was turned into a sex slave for years, given HIV, and sent to the hospital multiple times for internal injuries relating to his treatment, and the prison guards said "tough it up and don't be a pansy."
Re:To quote George Carlin (Score:4, Insightful)
Did you miss the part where I said that I make rape jokes? :)
It's not about lightening up - jokes are perfectly fine. The cultural attitude of behind them is not.
Everything is a joking matter - but some things we should be laughing at so we don't cry, not because we think it's slapstick.
I make the point about this because I don't think most people consider male rape a real social problem... it's just funny. Whereas a girl getting raped, that's serious business.
I guess I say it's the difference between making Pollack or Nigger jokes tongue in cheek and actually being racist. The jokes are fine - meaning them isn't.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
People bag about the Japanese prision system being so harsh and mean, I disagree.
I would rather be in a Japanese jail cell where they lock you in a small room with no one, no prison yard, no TV, no personal property privileges and it is lonely. That a prison in the US where your bunkmate is "Bubba" and he thinks your lips look really pretty. I would rather be isolated and cut off from any one that have someone raping me in a prison.
I think the US prisons are cruel in that they allow such behavior to occur in the first place. In a way it is cruel and unusual punishment.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
People talk about "inhumane" prison systems such as those in Iran (they cut your hands off!) or Saudi Arabia (they have public hangings and beheadings!) but we have gang-rape that is basically sanctioned by the state. Americans think their prison system is cushy but if they only knew the truth to the ass-rape joke they make they would be inclined to do something about it.
I love America. That's why I try to improve it (by criticizing its failures) so we can do more to improve it. It's un-American, I think, to rest on the laurels of our forefathers and say, "America is number one!" without doing anything to make it better.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
Both my parents are in prison (my mom is guilty, but I believe my dad to be innocent)in Texas
My mom shared a story to me and it was many years go...in the 90s. The story is about how Texas uses live prisoners to test their tracking dogs.
that is cruel treatment....
another dog tracking tail....
I have no understanding of why prisoners are needed to test dogs tracking abilities or why tracking bracelets weren't used on the prisoners.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Funny)
For example, a 17-year-old boy was gang-raped in prison [nytimes.com] after he robbed a guy with a toy gun.
I don't know how many times that is, but it sounds like a lot.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Informative)
The rate at which female inmates are raped is even higher than among males.
http://stopthedrugwar.org/chronicle-old/382/tellthestories.shtml [stopthedrugwar.org]
I couldn't find the article, but I read one on CNN which stated that sex is treated as a currency in womens prison where often times male guards are working even thought that is not supposed to be the case. AFAIR it was talking about cases where female prisoners were routinely "rented" out to male prisoners by the guards.
The male population in prison is much higher, which makes for a higher number of rape cases, but relatively speaking the problem is even worse among the female prison population.
Re:What to do next? (Score:5, Insightful)
he will go to many more years of Federal Pound-me-in-the-a$$ Prison
First, a minor bit of pedantry: only prostitutes have a$$es. Everyone in the US has asses, and everyone not in the US has arses.
Second, isn't "I hereby sentence you to five years of being assraped" unconstitutional? It violates the injunction against cruel and unusual punishment, and only men get assraped in prison. I'm surprised that freed felons aren't suing the government left and right; it's the warden and jailers' responsibilities to ensure that prisoners aren't committing crimes in prison.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Regrets? (Score:4, Informative)
Re:Regrets? (Score:5, Funny)
Of course there are. He should email everybody to apologise!
Federal prison camp? (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Federal prison camp? (Score:5, Insightful)
Because there is a difference between sending spam and committing a violent crime?
There are countries where jail is jail, whether you're a mass murderer or a serial jaywalker. I kinda like living in a country where they're not going to throw me in with the violent offenders if I scam the IRS.
Re:Federal prison camp? (Score:5, Insightful)
I kinda like living in a country where they're not going to throw me in with the violent offenders if I scam the IRS.
Probably the laws are that way because the law makers are more likely to scam the IRS than to be murderers.
Re:Federal prison camp? (Score:4, Insightful)
Tell that to Al Capone.
Re:Federal prison camp? (Score:5, Informative)
If you're in the US, you're blissfully ignorant of the reality of the situation. My friend Linda was sent to Dwight Correctional Center, [wikipedia.org] a maximum security hellhole, for non-violent drug posesssion. Not sales, mind you, but nonviolent posession for personal use.
OTOH Lance Carter, a violent asshole who was dishonorably discharged from the Marines who I avoid when possible, broke into a man's home and tried to murder him with a large butcher knife. He spent two weeks in the Sangamon County Jail for home invasion.
I was going to link the newspaper article about his arrest, but it appears they've removed it. It's quoted in this NSFW journal [slashdot.org] about the incident.
What were her circumstances? (Score:5, Insightful)
It feels like you're not telling the whole story -- what did she possesses and how much and in what circumstances?
In even the harshest states, simple possession of small use quantities of even felony-level drugs doesn't result in maximum security prison time simply because there are too many people being caught committing the crimes and even our idiotic justice system has recognized to some extent that addiction and dependency are real issues.
Only 3-strikes offenders, non-personal-use quantities or possession during the commission of a felony end up adding up to real prison time. The federal system is worse due to mandatory minimums (which, IIRC, they recently made harder to impose).
I have heard of (usually) women getting burned on conspiracy beefs due to boyfriends/husbands/fathers/brothers being involved and the women being passively complicit.
So what actually happened to her that Illinois wanted to spend $40k a year to house her?
Re:Federal prison camp? (Score:5, Funny)
One possible benefit is that on coming out of jail he might be a little less keen to help people enlarge their penises.
Silver linings (Score:5, Funny)
On the upside, I'm pretty sure it's legal to shoot escaped convicts.
Re:Silver linings (Score:5, Funny)
Spam King season!!
21 months? (Score:5, Interesting)
Who the hell runs from a 2 year bid at a club fed?
Re:21 months? (Score:5, Insightful)
A moron? I guess we all suspected the kind of people who make their living spamming, but now we have proof.
Re:21 months? (Score:5, Insightful)
Oops (Score:5, Funny)
That Bastard (Score:5, Funny)
He's going to totally ruin the honor system for everyone else.
Heh (Score:5, Interesting)
From the comments from the article (because I know most of you won't read it, and I'm not going to take credit for it). "One can only hope his punishment will be unsolicited male."
Re:Heh (Score:5, Insightful)
It's not how much you steal, it's how you steal it. If you pull a gun to steal a twinkie, you get more time and higher security than if you steal millions in some white collar scheme.
In the end, just being caught is often the end of your white collar crime spree, because it's really difficult to get yourself back in that position when you've got a record. But if you're a violent offender, you're equally a danger to society before and after jail.
Re:Heh (Score:5, Insightful)
Prison is for violent people.
You forgot our incredibly successful war on drugs.
more jail time, higher security (Score:4, Interesting)
Obligatory... (Score:5, Funny)
My inbox is full. (Score:5, Funny)
In real jail, your inbox is crammed full of unsolicited male.
Re:My inbox is full. (Score:4, Funny)
Your outbox may also be affected.
Re:My inbox is full. (Score:5, Funny)
Wouldn't that technically be your "sent" folder being crammed full of unsolicited male? I mean, in my case that particular ummmm..."folder" is reserved for "outbound correspondence."
Maybe *you* receive inbound messages via that folder. Not that there's anything wrong with that...I'm not going to judge how another man handles his mail. Well, unless he's willfully running an open relay. That's just immoral.
What an idiot (Score:5, Insightful)
He had a 21 month sentence in a minimum security work camp a.k.a "Club Fed". Now he gets an automatic 10 years added on for escaping and he'll be doing it in maximum security "Pound me in the ass" prison with the real bad dudes. This guy really isn't very bright.
Re:What an idiot (Score:5, Insightful)
He needed clothing sure, but why go home? They are sure to 'attempt to reacquire him there. I would.'
I suggest that we proceed on the assumption that he is bright enough to (1) run the cost-benefit analysis on escaping and (2) have a cache of cash and ID stored in preparation for a serious attempt to get out of the country and (3) isn't planning on returning to the US, ever.
Moving to Nigeria (Score:4, Funny)
A Letter (Score:5, Funny)
Dear Batman,
You protected Gotham from the personification of fear, the Scarecrow.
You protected Gotham from the personification of chaos, the Joker.
Now a new threat has arisen.
Your people need you now, more than ever for the personification of annoyance, irritation and aggravation has escaped his just imprisonment, the Spam King!
While I know how adverse you are to taking a life even in the most dire circumstances, in this instance I believe I speak for everyone and say that this man is a threat to sanity itself. So, should he threaten innocents with p3n1s en1argm3n7 or heirs to Zimbabwean fortunes, we'll understand if you have no choice but to drop him off of a building or something. Pummeling him to death would be acceptable too.
Here Is His Description (Score:5, Funny)
Be on the lookout for a man with a large penis and breasts, lots of mortgages, sexy naked teens, and a bottle of v1@grA. He was last seen with the ex-Minister of Finance for Nigeria, Dr Mugotumbe.
I am very pleased to hear of this escape! (Score:5, Insightful)
And I'm sure when he's there, locked up late at night with 'tiny', that he's going to regret sending those herbal Viagra and penis enlargement emails.
A proposal of mutual interest (Score:5, Funny)
How to Escape from Prison (Score:4, Funny)
1. Have Wife (sic) drive up to your cell
2. Jump in wife's car
3. ????
4. Get Away! (Profit?)
Didn't know what it was, so I looked it up... (Score:5, Informative)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Federal_Prison_Camp [wikipedia.org]
This describes the one in Nevada. (I couldn't find the one in CO)
Inmates, who dress in tan shirts and pants, may participate in a work program on Nellis AFB. The inmates typically perform janitorial services, cleaning floors, restrooms, and emptying trash from office buildings around the base. They also perform groundskeeping, and clean the base bowling alley. Each workcenter that uses inmate labor must assign an NCO or officer to monitor and direct the work throughout the day. These monitors receive a card after training (a video and lecture given by the correctional officers). The card authorizes monitors to transport the prisoners with them each morning (most weekdays) to their workcenters. Inmates are not allowed to leave the base to perform work. Inmates often say the work relieves the boredom they would otherwise face at the prison camp. The program saves taxpayers money that would otherwise be spent on contracted services or longer/less productive work hours by military personnel.
And this is about the Women's one in WV:
The camp comprises 105 acres (425,000 mÂ) of rolling hills. While there are no metal fences surrounding the camp, prisoners have schedules and must work. Free time is spent playing volleyball, softball or tennis.
Most of the inmates at FPC Alderson have been convicted of non-violent or white-collar crime. They sleep in bunk beds in dormitories or in cottages.
2nd amendment FTW (Score:5, Informative)
You're allowed to shoot escaped convicts on sight, right?
best spam king quote ever -- (Score:5, Funny)
http://talkback.zdnet.com/5208-12691-0.html?forumID=1&threadID=50057&messageID=938515&start=0
Yikes, that photo... (Score:4, Funny)
But based on that mug shot, I would think was guilty of making Spam (the meat) out of his victims.
Is this what I have to look forward to in my IT career? To end up looking like Jeffrey Dahmer?
Looks like he may have killed his family, self (Score:5, Informative)
ARAPAHOE COUNTY, Colo. -- A man, woman and toddler were shot to death and a teenage girl was wounded outside a home near Bennett Thursday in what an investigator called a "horrific" scene. Neighbors told The Denver Post that the man was 'Spam King' Edward "Eddie" Davidson and his family. The Arapahoe County Sheriff's Office said another infant appeared to be unharmed in the shooting.
So he escapes jail to kill himself and his family? (Score:5, Insightful)
Sad (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Since when? (Score:5, Insightful)
He was spamming for pump-n-dump stock schemes. The SEC doesn't like that and had the resources to go after him. If he stuck to replica watches and bogus diplomas he'd still be living like a Spam King.
Re:wow (Score:4, Insightful)
A clever idiot. But not intelligent in the Socratic definition of the term, which is to say, long-term intelligence, to live a long and contented life. Wisdom, damn it.
I mean, he made his fortune by targeting and flooding our homes and offices, via our inboxes, with something everybody detests, and he was real good at it, too.
This man made a conscious decision to become a lifelong pariah. Clever, yes, intelligent, no.
So it shouldn't be too surprising that he continues this pattern by not paying his dues in minimum security, choosing to become a much more serious target for the law for the rest of his life.
There is not a particle of common sense in this man's mind. The asshole acts like an identity thief.