Spammer Apologizes 288
radarsat1 writes "The Globe and Mail reports that Canadian professional spammer Eric Head, after being sued by Yahoo!, has apologized formally for his behaviour and vows to mend his ways by teaching others about the dangers of the internet. Let's hope others begin to take his lead."
Assuming... (Score:5, Funny)
Ob Simpson's Quote (Score:5, Funny)
me to call every person in town to apologize for my telemarketing scam.
I'm sorry. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me, send one
dollar to Sorry Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. You have the
power.
Comment removed (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Assuming... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Assuming... (Score:2, Funny)
(Yes, that last pa
Subject: Apology (Score:3, Funny)
From: Eric Head
To: andavis9
(NOTE: My name isn't even slightly close to "andavis")
Subject: Apology
Andavis9
Super Cheap Deal! Generic Viagra from $3 WOW!!
most places charge $15, we charge $3 ONLY!
- No embarassing doctor visits
- Private and secure online ordering
- Shipped worldwide!!
Order today, and become the stud you always wanted to be.
http://-------.biz/superhard/
This is one-time e-mailing. No-removal are required.
rkndfjbhjhfmmkkoaeucmu ow mz
pj ix usynr
rz
Re:Subject: Apology (Score:3, Informative)
Oh, look.... It's Ryan Campion and AMR Ventures [spamhaus.org]!
Spamhaus is getting amazingly good at figuring out who the spammer is behind most of this stuff. Do a host lookup on that spammed url, plug it into the SBL Lookup page [spamhaus.org], then check the results.
Subject: LEARN ABOUT THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET (Score:5, Funny)
Subject: LEARN ABOUT THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET
STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL & URGENT.
Dear,
Are you sick of getting scammed? Have you been burned by offers to consol1date your m0rtg.age, add 1nches to your man hood, or win a fre-ee is1and get@way?
We all have! BUT NO MORE!
"The Dangers of the Internet", the incredible new book by Eric Head, former Director of DirectConsumer Marketing Affairs for a Fortune 500 company*, will show YOU how to keep from getting scammed in the future! Best of all, the book is absolutely FRIE, with your purchase of this inexpensive herbal v1@gra alternative! Only three payments of $39.99 each, WOW!!
*in China.
(Eric) Head, Talking! (Score:5, Funny)
Am I right? Am I wrong?
And you may say to yourself
My god! What have I done?
Re:(Eric) Head, Talking! (Score:2, Funny)
"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about th (Score:5, Insightful)
Is that supposed to be a joke? Come on, what a cop out. I'm all for people reforming, but why does this sound so phoney? I give it 6 months before he's back at it again, probably based out of China or Russia.
BEWARE THE DANGERS OF THE INTERNET (Score:5, Insightful)
-Eric (aka Shit) Head.
Not for sarcasm impaired: I'm not actually Eric Head.
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:5, Insightful)
I'd characterise the judgment as creative if not novel plea bargaining by a good lawyer.
If it helps, think of it as the Al Gore version of picking up trash from the side of a freeway. Personally, I'd rather see him picking up trash. Without the orange vest.
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:2, Funny)
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:4, Funny)
Ammo...15-25$
Hunter's permit...25$
Spammer all tied-up and disguised to look like a moose during hunting season....priceless
There are somes things money can't buy...
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:5, Insightful)
I think it may just be a reality shift for a lot of these spammers. They all seem so indignant at first, when accused of being slimy Internet carpet-baggers. But on the other hand, people are always encouraged to seek fortune, and originally there were no rules, lots of money to be had, and old adages about opportunity knocking.
Once the money is rolling in, anyone would be tempted to rationalize their own business practice, even after being kicked off of relays, threatened with lawsuits, and having your iron pushed offshore. Once you're invested in something, it's hard to stop believing in it. That's why you see people go down kicking and screaming and come up contrite after a jury of peers schools them in the prevailing ethics.
Bottom line - not everyone is destined to be a repeat offender. Even if he toes the line for a while and doesn't buy it, maybe he'll educate consumers or discourage future spammers along the way, or maybe he'll start buying his own sermon.
Rule #1. Spammers lie. (Score:2)
You will not make lots of money working from home.
He will be spamming again.
Re:Rule #1. Spammers lie. (Score:2, Insightful)
From: http://bruce.pennypacker.org/spamrules.html
Re:Rule #1. Spammers lie. (Score:5, Funny)
But I thought that one pill makes you larger, one pill makes you small, and the ones that mother gives you don't do anything at all! Just ask the rabbit, when he's ten feet tall.
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:5, Insightful)
>
> Is that supposed to be a joke? Come on, what a cop out. I'm all for people reforming, but why does this sound so phoney? I give it 6 months before he's back at it again, probably based out of China or Russia.
You're an optimist.
The Rules Of Spam:
1) Spammers lie.
2) If a spammer seems to be telling the truth, see rule #1.
3) Spam is theft.
4) Most spammers are stupid.
5) The natural course of a spamming business is to go bankrupt.
Considering that a lawsuit from Yahoo was the motivation of his "apology", and that his apology lays the bullshit on thicker than even you said, to wit:
Not just "others", but the chilllllllldrun!
I'll see your six months and raise you three: I give him 90 days before he's spamming again, and place a side bet with 10:1 odds that as per Rule #4, the spam comes from hijacked PCs connected through a Yahoo! co-branded service such as SBC-Yahoo DSL.
Spammers are "stupid"? (Score:5, Insightful)
One of the problems is that most spammers are not stupid. Now, they may be slime, they may be sociopaths, but stupid? Perhaps underestimating spammers in this way (which is common) is counterproductive to eliminating spam. And, virtually every CEO in this great country is more of a sleaze than most spammers, a much bigger leach on society. Are they too, "stupid"?
Re:"vows to mend his ways by teaching others about (Score:3, Insightful)
Ultimate Insensitive Clod! (Score:2, Funny)
In Soviet Russia, Canada Spams YOU!
Re:Ultimate Insensitive Clod! (Score:2)
I got my apology email from him. He also was kind enough to ask if I was interested in some Viagra...
Oh, ok... (Score:5, Funny)
What is he sorry for? (Score:5, Insightful)
Is he sorry that he bothered millions of users, clogged up mailboxes, and generally made a nusiance of himself? Or, is he sorry that he got caught?
And, if he's teaching about the "dangers of the internet," does that mean he'll teach people to avoid scams like the ones he launched? Or, is he going to teach other spammers about how he got caught?
Not all spammers are evil. (Score:4, Insightful)
Re:Not all spammers are evil. (Score:4, Insightful)
It's only wrong if you care about other people (Score:4, Insightful)
Annoying potential customers is something most spammers _do_ understand, but since they can make money with a 0.0001% success rate (or whatever), they're happy to let the other 49.9999% of the potential customers get their Herbal Fake Viagra from other sources - it's just a marketing niche choice, and different spammers may make different choices about how blatantly to lie and how flashy and annoying their ads can be based on real or imagined response rate.
During a lawsuit, some spammers may realize how much direct cost they've caused (because they may have to pay it, if they've got any money), and they may realize how many people are mad enough at them to sue them, and they may even begin to understand how many of the 9 billion email messages they sent went to duplicate addresses. But that's not the same as realizing the effects it has on the recipient, because you have to _care_ about the recipient, and sociopaths fundamentally don't care about other people.
On the other hand, some spammers do _begin_ to understand how spam recipients feel when they have to keep changing their phone numbers because of all the calls in the middle of the night asking them if they're unsatisfied about their penis size or whether they'd like a great deal on a mortgage on their new place in Siberia.
Re:What is he sorry for? (Score:3, Insightful)
To quote every cop I've ever known...
"They're always sorry after they get caught. If they really felt that way, they wouldn't be doing $CRIME in the first place"
I A M S@RRY (Score:5, Funny)
*No PrescrlptlonNeeded
*Fully Confldential
*No Embarrassment
*No Waiting Rooms
*Shlpped Overnlght
*Dlscreet Packaging
Spammer apologizes.... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Is the Nigerian PM still (Score:3, Funny)
Once I've done my part to secure enough money to get the locked bank accounts transferred over here into my name THEN the Nigerian PM wi
Great.... (Score:2, Funny)
*Sniffle* (Score:5, Interesting)
"I'm sorry, I didn't realize it would be such a problem!" *wipes nose with C-note* "I only wanted to make a couple extra dollars a month, put an extra bread roll on the table..." *lights cigarette from burning $50*
He may be sorry, but I'm sure his bank account isn't...
Re:*Sniffle* (Score:5, Insightful)
Translation? "I just got sued by yahoo and this isn't worth it anymore. I think I'll take the rest of my dirty money and retire with this one last publicity stunt."
I wonder... (Score:5, Insightful)
Meanwhile in a lair on Minnow Pond Drive... (Score:2, Funny)
Not Bad (Score:5, Insightful)
Now what, they pay $100,000, move to Tahiti and retire for the rest of their lives? That'll show'em!
Re:Not Bad (Score:2)
Re:Not Bad (Score:2)
Re:Not Bad (Score:2, Interesting)
Re:Not Bad (Score:5, Insightful)
This apology is an insult to anyone who actually has to work for a living.
Re:Not Bad (Score:3, Insightful)
Capital crime? Correct me if I'm wrong, but that would mean he'd not just be in prison, but on death row. I wouldn't mind prison and a caning, but in all sincerity the death penalty seems a tad extreme for spamming.
Nothing says "I'm sorry" (Score:5, Insightful)
Wanna bet a public apology was part of the secret settlement terms?
JavaScript (Score:5, Informative)
Re:JavaScript (Score:3)
Re:JavaScript (Score:3)
var domain_ = "bar.net"
var at_ = String.fromCharCode(64);
var user_ = "foo"
document.write("<A HREF=\"mailto:" + user_ + at_ + domain_ + "?subject=" + "hello there!" + "\"><U>" + "Email me" + "</U></A>")
Rule #1 (Score:5, Insightful)
Re:Rule #1 (Score:4, Funny)
Rule #2, nobody talks about - oh... nevermind.
Wait a minute... (Score:5, Insightful)
What is that and how is he qualified to teach people about it?
I guess that's getting to be the standard line now -- "Honest, I'm really sorry. But I'm not responsible, it was the Internet!"
What's next, "I'm sorry I was drunk and ran over you're kid but the road was responsible. I'll teach poeple about the dangers of driving."
sheesh. --rhad
Re:Wait a minute... (Score:3, Insightful)
Re:Wait a minute... (Score:2)
New business model? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:New business model? (Score:2)
The right direction (Score:4, Insightful)
Let's hope other businesses take Yahoo's lead and sue the HELL out of spammers.
I'll accept his apology if... (Score:5, Funny)
he paid yahoo?! (Score:2, Insightful)
Hello, Satan, is it snowing? (Score:3, Insightful)
And then the second one is, "nah, he's just faking it, trying to dodge the artillery rounds Yahoo sent his way. Once the storm blows over, he'll be selling V1@GR@ by the truckload again."
I'll believe his apology when he delivers it in person to everyone who ever got a spam e-mail. Maybe he should set up something like a book-signing tour where he sits at a table and people queue up to hear him say, "I'm sorry for being a horrible waste of human flesh, I mean a spammer."
-paul
Eric HEAD (Score:2)
No wonder everything was for penis enlargement
How to make a million dollars (Score:5, Interesting)
1) Setup massive spamming operation
2) Make millions
3) Get sued and settle for a mere six figures
4) Stop spamming operation
5) Tell world you going to help children
So within the scope of a year or two, everyone will forget how this man made his fortune, and revere him for his good works helping children.
Sounds a lot like the Carnegie [uh.edu] Legacy [carnegiehall.org]
Re:How to make a million dollars (Score:3, Interesting)
Carnegie drove millions of men to early graves with horrible working conditions and an insane desire to work them until they dropped. Spammers work the lines, pounding out messages 24/7 until mail servers die of exh
Inconvenience (Score:2)
How noble! (Score:5, Insightful)
Gates Apologizes (Score:3, Funny)
Coming soon...
Bill Gates has formerly apologized for producing bloated, buggy software and forcing it down people's throats by making computer manufacturers install it on all new machines. "We will be issuing out a free version of Microsoft Windows and Microsoft Office to all existing customers that will remove all of the unnecessary bloat that we have been adding over the years and fix all of the bugs and annoyances we have introduced," Gates said at a press conference today. "We acknowledge that our customers can probably think for themselves better than we can think for them. Clippy and all those other annoying animations will be no more!"
He also expressed regret over allowing Internet Explorer to languish for so long. "With the example of the innovative browsers like Firefox and Opera, it has become obvious that our browser is severely lacking. With new versions of Windows, the user will be presented with the option of installing the browser of their choice."
Microsoft plans to slash their prices on all new Windows merchandise and remove the restrictions on computer manufacturers to allow "greater freedom in the software market". The new initiative is for "smaller, faster, cleaner" throughout their product lines. They have also expressed plans to release a free update to Visual Studio .NET to fix its many bugs. "We have come to the realization that we need to trust programmers to write their own code, especially since our employees have no clue how to write clean HTML code. There is no reason that we should force our customers to purchase an update with such a gross oversight."
Well, if a spammer can apologize, maybe, just maybe... nah.
Spam sucks (Score:5, Interesting)
To check for false positives, I review all of the trapped mail from time to time, and I'm starting to get discusted with the whole spam thing. Here is some of the crap that I get:
GET VALIUM AND MANY OTHER DRUGS 4 L j
China World Trade Corp making major breakthroughs
GET YOUR UNI.VERSITY D|PLOMA tqlylsrvi
Take advantage of low interest-rates!
Powerful weightloss now available where you are.
Fwd:re:Home del.very on all meds.
I'm also starting to get amused at how easy it is to identify spam with enough rules in spamassassin. These guys suck at sending mail.
I just can't believe that some people actually respond to some of the mails. The ones that get me are the mortage and loan ones. Who in their right mind would give all of their financial information to someone who randomly emails you with junk like this:
HellWo dear hom5ke oUwn5er,
We have b\eeQn notified that y<oiur mortgMage rate is fixed at a
vet6ry hoyigh interesNt rate. Therefore yhqou are current overpay[ing,
whick7h sumsRs-up to twhXo+usaEAnds of dollXLarws an5RnudPal0ly
Lugckily for you we can [1]guoGaranteze th@e lowest r{ates in the U.S.
([2]3.50%). So hSVu=rry beQ0caNuse the ratHe f.orecast i|s not
l;oobrkincNg good!
Thesgre is no obligations, an6d i^t FykREAE
Locnk on the 3.50%, even wHSith bad credit3A!
Where all of the urls are behind a yahoo redirector, and its barely legible from all of the obfuscation techniques?
Fuck spam specific laws, it just should be illegal to try to get money from someone under the pretense of deception. Clearly mails like this are deception, and its getting out of hand.
Re:Spam sucks (Score:2)
Re:Spam sucks (Score:5, Interesting)
1) Check the header for the usual.
2) Pipe the subject and body to a shell script that returns the number of spelling errors (via aspell etc.).
Too big a number from #2 means spam, l33t, very poor spelling or an email that is not english at all. None of which I care to read anyways!
Re:Spam sucks (Score:5, Informative)
You can see my results here: Spam Spell [vamos-wentworth.org]
Re:Spam sucks (Score:4, Interesting)
Well, it IS working! I respect the time and effort you put into your study, however I have an Inbox and Junk folder that tend to disagree with your findings and conclusions.
Like I said, step 1 is checking headers. You can find alot of spam just by looking there. Also keep in mind that I said pipe to a shell script, not to aspell. I do alot of massaging before passing the body on to aspell.
I question the values you have for 'ham'. I can think of no one that I correspond with that has spelling as atrocious as your samples would indicate. Not even Slashdot is that poor at spelling as a whole. I often deal with people who use English as a second language. And while the grammar might be off, the spelling is usually passable.
Anyways I suspect that there might be text being processed by your script that isn't part of the sender's message (for example HTML, although a quick look at your PERL shows that you are looking for tags.)
It would be nice to see the emails that scored poorly on your test, to see if there is some other culprit skewing your results.
FWIW, this post contains 7 errors out of 235 words, 5 of which would have been in my custom dictionary. Giving either a 2.9% or 0.9% error rate.
Re:Spam sucks (Score:3, Interesting)
The high rate of bad spellings for nonspam on my server is most like because of:
1. Technical mail lists with lots of "non-words".
2. The occassional Hungarian email.
The former could be fixed by skipping the spell check for anything coming from the list servers. I purposely left those in the spell check step to see what would happen.
The second is trickier. There is no sure fire way of knowing the language of an email. My wife gets Hungaria
Re:Spam sucks (Score:2)
and real decpetion is even worse!
rule #1: criminals lie
rule #2: see rule #1
Bring us the head of Eric Head!!! (Score:2, Funny)
Retirement at 25 (Score:3, Insightful)
Jumpin' reporters... (Score:2)
If they started doing that to me, I'd put mirrors in front of my windows.
Subj: I'm sorry (Score:3, Funny)
To: asdf (you@yourdomain.com)
Subj: I'm sorry
I'm sorry about spamming you all these years. If you forgive me, send $1 to "Sorry Dude"
742 Evergreen Terrace
--Sorry Dude
Why an apology? (Score:2, Interesting)
I'm a firm believer in... (Score:2, Interesting)
This won't reduce the amount of junk mail I get. Like music sharing, spamming will only go deeper underground now that it has become illegal (well, at least restricted). I will continue to get spam until the internet has advanced enough to allow me to reach out and stab spammers in the eye.
Mis-reading the article... (Score:2, Funny)
slap on the wrist. (Score:3)
Poor guy had to give up some fraction of his ill-gotten gains from spamming. I'd prefer extradition and I'd love to see this guy in the federal pen with a cellmate named Bubba who does to him what he's done to my email all these years.
-- Greg
Ill sign up for that class... (Score:2)
Hello your@name . xcppeqd (Score:3, Funny)
This is not spam! Let me tell you about the dangers of the internet!
If you're not careful, you might start to send unsolicited email. Lots of it. I don't.
If you do not wish to receive more messages like this, click here [slashdot.org].
Best regards,
Erihk Heed
Whats the proper phrase for what I am thinking... (Score:2)
Oh yeah!
"Liar liar, pants on fire!"
Standard spammer rules apply in this case, especially 1 and 2.
The Rules Of Spam [pennypacker.org]
head (Score:2)
Spam King Richter going straight as well (Score:4, Interesting)
I'll believe it when I (don't) see it.
Re: (Score:2)
Re:I'd rather hear about its Glories (Score:4, Insightful)
Because fear sells.
Spammer Apologizes... (Score:2, Funny)
Simple solution to spam (Score:5, Funny)
This is not an apology (Score:4, Insightful)
This is the kind of non-apology that seems pretty common though. If you follow the words sorry with "if" or "may" or "might have", then it's not an apology.
That assumes he means it... (Score:3, Insightful)
I'm so glad he's sorry (Score:4, Insightful)
I'll be satisfied when everyone he's ever spammed gets to line up and slap him. He can opt out by writing to a postal address, which will be set up pretty soon.
Re:I'm so glad he's sorry (Score:4, Insightful)
opt-out is still wrong (Score:5, Insightful)
This is a bunch of crock. Compliance with that bogus law (the U-CAN-SPAM law) doesn't mean it isn't theft. This guy is obviously still thinking like a spammer.
No one should ever have to opt-out of anything they never opted-in to in the first place.
There are 28+ million businesses (from largest to smallest) in the US (and plenty more outside the US). If just 1 million of these businesses decided to send you just one mailing (that you didn't ask for) per year (and you don't even need to opt-out because they won't send another for a whole year), and assuming they send them evenly spread throughout the year, then you will be getting one every 31.556952 seconds on average (depending on what year it is). More likely, those mailings will come in bunches. Since you won't have to opt-out, you can just press "delete" over 2737 times a day, every day. That would be over 83 thousand pieces of mail a month (imagine what that would do to the typical $9.95 a month dialup internet account).
Now imagine if they all were giving you an opportunity to opt-out via their web site.
If we allow spamming to become the norm, then every business will end up having to do it to just keep an equivalent advantage. That could mean that 150 million internet users would each get spammed from 20 million businesses. That would be 3 quadrillion (that's 3000 trillion) pieces of useless mail overloading the internet mail server infrastructure.
Re:opt-out is still wrong (Score:3, Funny)
How sorry is he really? (Score:4, Insightful)
I suggest suicide... (Score:4, Funny)
well (Score:3, Funny)
i hope he sends us all a letter of apology to back up his words
This sucks. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:I'll accept, under my own terms. (Score:2)
I WANT SOME BLOOD MIXED IN WITH THE POUND OF FLESH!
We don't want this wastrel getting off on a technicality, do we?