Haiku vs Spam 722
Mark Cantrell was among several people who sent in a story about a company using "Haiku to Stop Spam. Essentially you use a copyrighted Haiku
to tag that a message meets criteria (1 Recipient, Pre-Existing Relationship,
etc) which then makes it a simple matter to filter the mail. I'm sure the spammers in China will laugh wildly as they forge the haiku. I challange comment posters to post only Haiku in this discussion ;)
Ignorance is beaming (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Funny)
Stories posted thoughtlessly
Proofreads for the weak.
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:3, Funny)
lynx slashdot.org --dump 2>/dev/null|grep haiku
lynx slashdot dot org
make all errors disappear
then grep for haiku
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Interesting)
You offer:
In syllables, it still works in Unix. Nicely done!
dash dash dump, err to dev null,
piped thru grep haiku
But a good haiku is a metaphor between man and nature, still crammed into the syllabic form.
ignoring all distraction,
eyes only its prey.
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Funny)
The *spammers* are from China.
Not the poetry.
Japanese art... (Score:4, Funny)
Unfortunately it's only available on Paper View.
(sorry, it's a slow day)
Re:Japanese art... (Score:3, Funny)
But Americans won't know
What SKY TV is
For more clarity
Replace with US channel
such as HBO
Re:Japanese art... (Score:4, Funny)
ITV Digital had
the rights. But folded.
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Funny)
Hello, I send you
this file to have your advice,
thanks see you later.
Re: Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Funny)
Kahn: I live in California last twenty years, but, uh, first couple, Laos.
Hank: Huh?
Kahn: Laos. We Laotian.
Bill: The ocean? What ocean?
Kahn: We are Laotian. From Laos, stupid! It's a landlocked country in Southeast Asia. It's between Vietnam and Thailand, okay?? Population: four point seven million.
Hank: So... are you Chinese or Japanese?
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:5, Funny)
chinese send you more spam
while japanese write haiku
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:3, Informative)
You write Haiku 5,7,5. Pass it to a friend. They take a shot of Sake and write 7,7, to make it a Tanka. It go so popular that it became its own form.
Works well with 2 way hand shaking.
Winter's frozen spam,
Delicate jelly of meat,
Router eat it all.
Re:Ignorance is beaming (Score:3, Funny)
Example of Tanka (Score:4, Funny)
He nari totte
ada to omou na
morobi to yo
bu-u to naritotte
hotoke nari keri
Translation(rough):
When you fart
do not feel embarrassed
when you go *poot*
you become like Budda
Re:FM6 Haiku #1 (Score:3, Funny)
It makes baby Jesus cry
But much less than Spam
Haiku vs Spam (Score:2, Funny)
but at least a creative
request for flaimbait
Haiku! (Score:2)
haiku leaves something... (Score:5, Funny)
will leave much left unmentioned
but those are the rules
Re:haiku leaves something... (Score:5, Funny)
And now they're writing hiaku?
I'm afraid to look.
Re:To mikeee, re: "hiaku" (Score:5, Funny)
Pretend that it was satire.
Yeah, that's the ticket.
a haiku cycle (Score:4, Interesting)
problem with having
semantic meaning haiku-
transmittal can fail.
haiku is supposed
to have a season, color
and an animal.
these lines do not have
the proper prerequisites
it is not artful.
so, that just defeats
the reason one writes haiku-
makes it mockery.
int'resting to note,
it says that the mail sender
certifies the mail.
violation for
using the trademark wrongly
is a simple suit.
this will only work
if the spammer is truthful;
not hiding headers.
it's interesting,
that they specifically use
the haiku format.
possibilities
are quite endless. what next?
using sonnet form?
-k
award winning, no less (Score:5, Funny)
syllables ain't enough to
express a complete
Re:award winning, no less (Score:2)
Re:award winning, no less (Score:5, Funny)
I can never get all the
syllables to add up right
Re:award winning, no less (Score:4, Funny)
my haiku is incomplete,
four syllables.
Kintanon
finally! (Score:2)
no collateral damage.
ah, spam free morning.
Re:finally! (Score:3, Informative)
haiku lines have been unearthed [habeas.com]
(thanks to i0lanthe [slashdot.org])
Each line has a head
X-Habeas-SWE-n: where
n is 1, 2, 3
I can only guess
That "SWE" is sounded out "swee"
And "(tm)" sounds not.
The Zen of Spam (Score:5, Funny)
Sweet rain turns to killing flood
One mail, ten mails, spam.
Re:The Zen of Spam (Score:5, Funny)
Author understands haiku
Mod that sumbitch up.
Stop spam? Are you nuts?! (Score:2)
Please pass the mustard.
Mustard? (Score:2)
haiku groove (Score:2)
could you have predicted it?
I really doubt it
Don't forget seasonal foo (Score:5, Funny)
like shifting summer breezes,
fans Slashdot fires.
annotated: (Score:2)
Yes, we must have seasonal references! (Score:4, Funny)
trying to mail my user
fuck you, it's summer
click through haiku (Score:5, Funny)
Click-through Haiku
you must comply to
this copyright agreement
I agree || Cancel
obligatory troll (Score:5, Funny)
FreeBSD is dying
Score negative 1
With apologies to Basho... (Score:4, Funny)
jumps in; the sound of water;
please, please, no bubbles.
Power Outage Haiku (Score:5, Funny)
Power out, system silent
No power is Zen
hmm... (Score:2)
but this sounds cool to me now
spammers will have pain
Ob. Simpsons quote: (Score:2, Funny)
Your seat cushions float gently
Headsets five dollars."
YA Spam Haiku (Score:2)
SPEWS can stop that spammy flood
Always LART that spam!
Copyright - 5/7/5 (Score:2)
But the system leaks... (Score:2, Funny)
Reregister your domain
Click to unsubscribe
Ha! I got a spam through!
Some haikus for filtering! (Score:5, Funny)
please erase this from Inbox
Don't need viagra
this is for my friend
always so nice and helpful
no pyramid scheme
i hate christine hall
and her trafficmagnet site
send me endless spam
amazon dot com
stop sending me newsletters
I'm illiterate
Re:Some haikus for filtering! (Score:3, Funny)
My husband, a prince,
needs your bank account number.
Please -- this is urgent!
or:
I appeal to you
for help with all my secret
Nigerian cash.
Re:Some haikus for filtering! (Score:3, Funny)
Me? an idiot
How could I not trust this deal?
here you go my friend!
where did it come from? (Score:2)
Re:where did it come from? (Score:2)
good link (Score:2)
How to title a Haiku? (Score:3, Informative)
(For those who don't know: haiku is three lines of five, seven, and five syllables, in that order.)
FYI: How to haiku (Score:3, Informative)
HAIKU - (high-coo)
The haiku is a three-line, seventeen syllable, unrhymed poem, which uses nature as its primary focus. The Haiku captures a moment in nature or in life and freezes it with disciplined language. Each reader then thaws the message, the picture that has been painted by words, and brings the scene to life.
17 syllable, 3 lines
Line 1 5 syllables
Line 2 7 syllables
Line 3 5 syllables
Re:FYI: How to haiku (Score:5, Funny)
New story, they flood the board
Yearning for +5s
spam-stopping haiku (Score:2, Funny)
sucks more cock than piazza
slashdot sinks lower
Gradeschool English Teacher Cheers! (Score:5, Funny)
Finally vindicated
Haiku has a use
It's inevitable.. (Score:5, Funny)
Iambic Pentameter
Lesbian action?"
Okay, let me get this straight... (Score:2)
Have I about got it? I suppose there'd be options to have all messages go through to a "suspicious" box, or to do some kind of SpamAssassin tagging for unmarked email, etc.
So, how exactly is this different from homebrew "whitelist only" systems? The only distinguishing mark is that the sender's acceptance of a legal contract involves addition of a copyrighted mark, in this case, a haiku poem in a header.
If I've got my own whitelist system, that returns a message saying "use this string 'Mtzlplck' and the message will go through, but by doing this you agree that you're not a spammer, and if you violate this trust, I'll sue you," then I should have the same protections as if they'd illegially used a copyrighted mark. Right?
Or am I missing something significant?
The
Haiku (Score:2)
abuse acted on complaints
Joyous internet
url (Score:4, Interesting)
colon slash slash habeas
dot com. More info.
WTF. It's 5/7/5, people. (Score:5, Funny)
Learn to write proper haiku.
(I could teach my dog.)
- A.P.
YOu asked for it (Score:3, Funny)
Stopping spammers easily
Sue their asses now
[Slightly OT] nitpick time... (Score:5, Informative)
Displaying limited brains
May be quoted thus:
Habeas in fact
means "let us have" and no more
and not "evidence"
They are thinking of
"writ of habeas corpus"
"Let's have the body"
Nitpick mode now off
Let those who frequent this board
Now resume to speak.
Re:[Slightly OT] nitpick time... (Score:5, Informative)
Those endings are important.
This is what you said:
But that's not correct.
"Habeas" means "you should have."
It's second person,
singular, or so
I learned in Latin classes
many autumns past.
Spam Haiku by Chris Nieto (Score:5, Funny)
I ponder what you may be:
Snout or ear or feet?
yoda on licenses (Score:4, Funny)
email to people I know?
Now, matters are worse.
Read the article... (Score:4, Informative)
mystery revealed to you
poem placed in header
Ahem... (Score:5, Funny)
About filtering spam with Haiku.
So in five-seven-five,
All the
But I thought I should try something new!
So Habeas decides who's allowed to spam. (Score:3, Insightful)
Great, so now my inbox gets filled with spam, but from companies that are paying Habeas to do so. I'll have to add the domains of those who purchase licenses to my filters... wait, isn't that what I'm doing now?
Sure, sue spammers for trademark infringement, copyright violations. Yes, since the RIAA, MPAA, and Microsoft are having so much success stamping out piracy in China, I'm sure this new scheme is going to stop the spammers cold! In fact let me call my broker so I can buy some Habeas stock!
Just in time - a collection of Spam Haiku!!! (Score:4, Funny)
Like bodysnatchers,
Spam has crept into our lives
It will win, I think.
The mad scientist,
in the lab toils to create
square pigs for Hormel.
Spam, it does not reap,
neither doth it sow, I think,
it cunningly waits.
When left with the rest,
A wise man chose to call it
Spam: Sow Parts And Meat.
Glist'ning, shiny block,
too horrible to think from
where you came and how.
You must look at Spam
that does not correspond to
the knitting machine.
Spark'ling Spam that zaps
when eaten or dropped from high
drank from the charge pond.
Unlike the Eggy,
Spam not only 'can tongue', it
is canned tongue in steel.
Deep within the heart
of swine there cries out a voice
"Spam, my destiny."
Saw a therapist-
He made me wallow in Spam.
He was The Rapist.
Ran out of dead cows
to loft at the seiged city.
Used Spam, rest all died.
Ship loaded with Spam
runs aground on the dark reef.
Oil slick and fish kill.
Greasy loaf, digest.
Leave me better than you found-
Clog not arteries.
Truncated blue can,
how can you contain such vile
and slimy pig guts?
Who hast made thee, Spam?
Pink, glutinous, porcine parts
there in gelled repose.
Chopped and fried, layered
among other things pig-like,
surely a man's feast.
The Spam maps Pam's amps
hoping to find a way to
avoid the hot pan.
Spam spilled in the street,
greasy and slick from the can,
a twelve car pileup.
Faint whiff of the sea,
Greasy scent of things porcine,
I must open it.
Missles fly, "Nuke War!"
All is still, the earth cools down,
Roaches feast on Spam.
Sliced for sandwich,
formed as loaf, chopped for salad,
my Spam does not judge.
Once thought unclean, now
all pigs strive for a higher
plane of being - Spam.
By T. Goodfellow:
Conjugating Spam
spamo, spamas, spamatus
Boy I hate Latin.
Spam in my stocking
on December 25th
I was bad this year
50% off
an after-Christmas Spam sale
plenty to pick from
If Spam were outlawed
only outlaws would carry
guns made of pig meat
While on a cruise ship
"Spam overboard!" came the yell
No one seemed to care
Ma pig, to her son,
If you don't make something of
yourself, Hormel will.
I like Spam, I do
but I'd never admit it
to someone like you
Locked out of the house
on the doorstep shivering
Spam waits for its master
DaVinci drawing
to British scholars reveals
early Spam concepts
re-inventing Spam
I suggest we use soy beans
vegetarian
Like chicken and egg
does the can shape the Spam, or
does Spam shape the can?
Summer '59,
The rains came early, then dry
A great Spam vintage.
Sooner or later
zero or more cans of Spam
not pleasing itself
only Hormel can
make the manslaughter of pigs
Man's laughter of Spam
Hogs, none the wiser
board the bus to nirvana
destination: Spam
A pallet of Spam
could it be any worse than
Spam on the palette
Secret document
stolen by Chinese agents
Spam powered rockets
Proper etiquette
demands that Spam eaters
conceal agony
Attorneys or Spam
The only difference is
in the packaging
If Spam grew on trees
Newton's law calculations
would have been greasy
In a Spam glacier
a fully preserved mammoth
What a way to go
Tunneling inward
the electron microscope
atomic pig parts
pigs, each year with hope
in vain searching yellow pages
still no Spam heading
the stock broker
stuffing his porkfolio
going long on Spam
Anticipation
Spam in a ketchup bottle
s l o w l y s l i d i n g out.
Boy scout winter camp
Spam unevenly heated
half frozen; half burnt
How about these... (Score:5, Funny)
Someone owes you millions
too good to be true!
SlashDot article
Hyperlinks call to me but
afraid of GoatSex
Dear hated spammer,
You vandalise my hotmail.
Die with spike up ass!
SlashDot educates,
I thought Haiku Japanese,
Now I know better.
The strategy, in plain English (Score:4, Informative)
Aren't nearly enough words
To explain oneself.
The Habeas mark contains a three-line haiku protected by copyright law. Six other lines contain the copyright and trademark notices and other trademark protected information.... If senders fail to meet the criteria, they could be sued for trademark and copyright infringement, Mitchell said.
Basically, they're using copyright law to replace a non-existant spam law. If your header contains their copyrighted haiku, then you're not sending spam and you're allowed through. If you use the haiku header and you're still spam, you're violating their rules and are sued for copyright infringement.
Cute strategy, especially the part where they piggyback on the geek affection for gratuitous haiku, but it's built upon the (frankly) naive idea that their subscribers can get everyone they want to get email from to play along. It basically turns your entire flow of email into an "opt-in" list. It's nice that you can sue spammers with forged headers for copyright infringement, but that's not what's going to happen; what will happen is you'll get a "unknown sender" folder chock-full of spam and a few useful e-mails from people who don't know or don't care how to use the haiku header, and you'll still have to sort through it by hand every day.
The spammers won't need to forge their headers, unless (somehow) this tactic gets adopted by the entire Internet, including Yahoo, Hotmail and AOL. The inconvenience will be great enough that no one will want to play along anyway.
I've got your challange right here... (Score:3, Interesting)
I challenge the editors of Slashdot to quit posting crap like this. There is more going on in the world of SPAM prevention than the stupidity of adding Haikus to e-mail messages (great waste of bandwidth).
Maybe it passed by the editor's eyes that Apple has registered the trademark 'Junkyard' and has installed "sophisticated built-in junk mail filtering" into Mac OS X 10.2 [apple.com]. Rumor is that Apple will be adding junk mail filtering software in their Mac OS X Server OS. Junkyard is the product name for this technology that is going to be added/tagged on to Mac OS X Server's version of Sendmail. If it is like Rendezvous [apple.com], it will be open source and available to the Open Source Community.
Re:I've got your challange right here... (Score:3, Funny)
So the spammers must fight back
Then it's Junkyard Wars.
Re:I've got your challange right here... (Score:3, Insightful)
There is more going on in the world of SPAM prevention than the stupidity of adding Haikus to e-mail messages (great waste of bandwidth).
How much more a waste
is sending ASCII email
with HTML?
Seventeen syllables? (Score:5, Funny)
On the haiku form (Score:5, Insightful)
wind blowing, leaves falling
something about nature
spam unnatural
cut cows however you want
you will not find it
find the truth of it
syllables not everything
more to sky than stars
Haiku to spam (Score:3, Funny)
Is the haiku in the text?
Either way, it's spam
Doubtful. (Score:3, Insightful)
This will do much good at all.
Please let me explain:
Personal use is free,
But they charge firms to use it.
Not all firms will pay.
Most folks will prefer
To get a thousand spam than
To lose one real mail.
If it's mail from firms
That's more likely to get lost
That is even worse:
Mail folk WANT from firms
Tends to be most important:
Reciepts, upgrades, on..
In the article
They said mail lacking haiku
Should not be destroyed;
Yet having the mail
Brought to your attention is
Yes/No, no degree.
Even if you store
Suspect mail apart from clean
In case real mail's lost,
To check for that loss
You must sort through all the spam
Which defies the point.
Also mentioned was
Countries which don't have these laws
Can spam just the same:
So how long before
They set up remailer bots
That add the haiku?
Even if the mail
Didn't come from China when
It was written first,
The 'criminal' act -
Adding haiku without leave -
will have happened there.
Spam filters should be
Based on what mail to turn down,
Not what to accept.
oh great, haiku spam (Score:5, Funny)
click here for the pheromones
women will go crazy
penis too little
buck up, gullible person
this lotion will help
tired of debt? rejoice!
now all your worries are gone
(we are a non-profit)
psssst! Remember me?
I'm naked hot and horny
click for all nude pics
Error 575: Clue not found (Score:3, Funny)
copyright, SMTP
ignorance. Yeah, right.
not a damn Hiaku, so sue me... (Score:3, Insightful)
businesses and bulk e-mail companies will pay to use it.
so this is really just a way for them to get in the loop and make some money off the spammers.
ROTTEN!
Learn you some Haiku (Score:4, Informative)
Here is a very good article on it [empirezine.com] (featuring my favorite haiku BTW [rutgers.edu]).
It comes down to the semantics of English versus Japanese. Under English there is a much more constrictive syntax, thus the meaning of a phrase can change just by resorting the words (Japanese, OTOH, is more resilient). Why is this important? 17 syllables in English can carry much more meaning than 17 syllables in Japanese.
Most haiku authors agree that the rough mean in English should be 12 in three phrases. Of course that is just a starting point at best. One of Ezra Pound's better known haiku is 18 syllables in two lines. In the end haiku creation is not a rote process.
Two most common haikus (Score:3, Funny)
millions satisfied,
totally natural pill:
enlarge your penis.
(it even has a "natural" theme... sorta) and
a special offer,
a low interest mortgage.
chance of a lifetime.
RMN
~~~
nice read (Score:3, Insightful)
usually long winded
are much shorter now
Re:As requested (Score:3, Funny)
Two syllables are missing.
Do you know Haiku?
Anything that blocks
Spam from my machine is good.
How long will this work?
Re:As requested (Score:3, Funny)
Signal noise ratio falling
Slashdot fades to black...
Re:As requested (Score:3, Funny)
as my previous post proves
i go back to code
Re:As requested (Score:5, Insightful)
People adapting the haiku form to other languages may well relax the 5-7-5 rule, because it doesn't really make sense in many other languages other than Japanese. Every language has its unique sound which dicttaes its poetic form. However, I'd argue that a true haiku canot be created in any language other Japanese, or perhaps some other language that flows similarly. The true sound of a Japanese 5-7-5 stanza cannot be captured in English. I expect that certain English forms, such as the limerick, don't fare well in Japanese. English is a stressed language, so all limericks share a kind of flow to them: da-DAdada-DAdada-DUM, da-DAdada-DAdada-DUM, da-DAdada-DUM, da-DAdada-DUM,da-DAdada-DAdada-DUM.
But if this scheme works, I'll have no excuse... (Score:3, Interesting)
Effective filters
Steal the light out of my day
Weep, I, for lost pr0n
Re:As requested (Score:5, Insightful)
To make up for one lacking.
Still not enforceable.
Re:As requested (Score:3, Funny)
but how many syllables
has goatse.cx?
I'd include something
regarding "Taco-snotting"
in a verse or two.
Where is this 'poopbot'
when one needs him her or it
as the case may be.
You moderators
who mod this down as a troll
are indeed foolish.
It's obviously
my lame attempt at humor:
'overratted' sure,
perhaps 'redundant',
'funny' if you find it so.
Score minus one 'lame'.
One can only be
certain that moderation
prediction will cause
moderators to
try to make you a liar.
I hereby declare
then, that this post will
remain unmoderated
with default plus one.
Re:Come on! (Score:3, Funny)
before you post mindless trash
slashdot getting worse
Re:um.... (Score:2)
Then you move on to seven.
Five more to end it.
Re:I'm sure everyone is going to do this. (Score:2)
Re:Chinese? Don't think so. (Score:3, Funny)
Haiku poems are
Japanese, not Chinese; shows
what you know, Slashdot.
Re:Chinese? Don't think so. (Score:3, Funny)
please mod the parent post up
correct format please
Re:Mandatory spelling / grammar flame (Score:4, Funny)
you tried to correct spelling,
made grammar mistake
Re:fp (Score:3, Interesting)
anata wa baka desu
arigatou gozaimasu!
graspee
PS- not sure with "desu" etc if the "u" counts, since it is written but not pronounced. Well, not pronounced in Tokyo anyway...
Re:It's A Whole New Paradigm (Score:4, Interesting)
Message goes through filter
Otherwise blocked.
To license haiku
Sender must certify
Email is not spam.
For an ISP
Or individual user
The license is free.
Businesses and
Bulk email senders will pay
Habeas a fee.
Clever idea
But it must be in wide use
To ever do much good.
Is there a patent
Pending or applied for
On this email tool?
Windows User's Lament (Re:Typical Slashdot Haiku) (Score:3, Funny)
(No, I didn't write this, but I thought it was worth using here. Original author unknown.)â