Ransomware Making a Comeback 202
snydeq writes "Ransomware is back. After a hiatus of more than two years, a variant of the GpCode program has again been released, kidnapping victims' data and demanding $120 for its return, InfoWorld reports. 'Like the ransomware programs before it, GpCode encrypts a victim's files and then demands payment for the decryption key. The new version of GpCode — labeled GpCode.AX by security firm Kaspersky — comes with a bit more nastiness than previous attempts. The program overwrites files with the encrypted data, causing total loss of the original data, and uses stronger crypto algorithms — RSA-1024 and AES-256 — to scramble the information.'"
Encryption (Score:4, Funny)
Allright, bring back the Slot Machines of DOS! (Score:5, Funny)
I remember back when I was running MSDOS 5, and at first Bootup it cut to a screen with a Slot Machine that said it was a Virus holding my MBR and File Allocation Table ransom until I get such and such combination after I pull the Arm. It also said if I tried to turn-off the computer, then all my data is already gone unless I got the sequence in this game to restore my MBR and FAT.
Needless to say, I left the computer on all day and drove to my grandmother's Insanitarium/Old-Folk's home and said I didn't come visit these past 10 years because I've always given her bad luck and now I need her more than ever. She stopped taking her pills, said goodbye to the trees and bushes and pigeons as I walked her to my car, and upon arriving at my desk she knew exactly what to do: she pulled-out her vile of lipstick, puckered some on her mouth, and gave the computer screen a kiss. She was insane again.
Fuck you Slot Machine! I pulled the Arm, and I won back my MBR and FAT. I told my grandmother she could walk back home, and so I gave her $10 to buy some cigarettes and lunch, and I and her Retired-Living Facility have never seen her since.
1) 2) 2) -- They can't count to three (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Backups (Score:5, Funny)
because when it falls into a river of molten rock, man, it's gone.
Sounds like you learned that from experience. One of the cons of maintaining the data center for Sauron, huh? Hope the pay is good, at least.
Re:Ok, a question or two (Score:1, Funny)
If the money ends up going to a country like Somalia what are you going to do?
Ask for the Somali government's help to get your 100 bucks back?
Good luck with that.
What Somali government??
Somalia is freedom unlimited: no taxes, no government. Somalia is eagerly awaiting rich US emigrants, with special low rates for Tea Party members!