FBI Investigating Mystery Laptops Sent To US Governors 329
itwbennett writes "The FBI is trying to find out who is sending laptops to state governors across the US, including the governors of Wyoming and West Virginia. The West Virginia laptops were delivered to the governor's office on August 5, according to the Charleston Gazette, which first reported the story. Kyle Schafer, West Virginia's chief technology officer, says he doesn't know what's on the laptops, but he handed them over to the authorities. 'Our expectation is that this is not a gesture of good will,' he said. 'People don't just send you five laptops for no good reason.'"
Me (Score:5, Funny)
If the governors don't want them, I'll have them.
OLPG (Score:5, Funny)
Its obviously the one laptop per Governor project.
Are you kidding me? (Score:4, Funny)
Are you kidding me? I've received hundreds of free laptops from total strangers. In fact, I trust them so much that I do all my banking on them. After all, this nice downtrodden Nigerian prince has personally guaranteed the security and stability of all these laptops. Now, let me go check my bank balance....OMGWTFBBQ^*#^$@))*#$!!!!!
NO CARRIER
Reality is weirder than fiction (Score:4, Funny)
I can see it now (Score:5, Funny)
Re:OLPG (Score:2, Funny)
Compaq 15.6" CQ60-410US Notebook PC, I got mine for $298.00. Not a real cost.
Let's guess, one drunk, $1600.00 laying around and surf the web for governor's
addresses.
The malware? IE 8.0 plus VISTA Home edition. Instant coup.
Hard-Trojans (Score:5, Funny)
"A what? Whatever, put it in the yard next to the giant wooden horse."
Re:Hacked hardware? (Score:5, Funny)
The article says that they were HP laptops, not Sony.
</obvious>
Re:OLPG (Score:1, Funny)
How about good samaritans? (Score:0, Funny)
Noone trust those no more?
What if a beautiful woman would feel pity for your sorry ass never-get-laid geek character and offers you free sex to live your wildest dream at least once in your sad life? And she brings along her equally sexy girlfriend... You would turn them down, wouldn't you? You would be scared to death that they would turn mid-course into some gut sucking aliens or at least they would want to spread some nasty uncurable disease, wouldn't you? Unadventurous geek basterds...
Updated news report (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Me (Score:5, Funny)
West Virginia - keeping Hughes Net in business since 2005.
Re:a delivered local wi-fi attack? (Score:5, Funny)
"a delivered local wi-fi attack" is the best poetry I've read all day. Your lack of punctuation and capitalzation reminds me of e.e.cummings, and the unexpected Spielberg reference at the end is a stroke of genius. You should do poetry slams. (imagine "run superduper wi-fi haxor proggy" to the sound of a bass slapping. )
That's nothing... (Score:2, Funny)
Real bad guys would plant a Governor or a President, not some brainless laptops...
if i were a governor (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:5, Funny)
NO CARRIER
I understand breaking the monitor and keyboard in such situation, but you actually went out of the house, walked to your tool shack, picked up an axe and smashed your telephone line with it? That's a little bit aggressive, dont you think?
Re:a delivered local wi-fi attack? (Score:5, Funny)
I'm imagining it, but it's really hard to get a good rhythm out of a dead fish.
Re:Are you kidding me? (Score:1, Funny)
I thought NO CARRIER meant that his internet connection caused a power spike in his house and killed his air conditioner.
Re:Reality is weirder than fiction (Score:3, Funny)
Egad. If I want cheap obnoxious thrillers, I'll read Greg Bear's lesser work...
OLPC (Score:3, Funny)
One Laptop Per *CHILD*.
Re:send them back... (Score:3, Funny)
Nigeria actually has a bank called "Bank PHB" [promote-my-site.com] with the slogan "Be you, be free, be brilliant". I can't help but think of the PHB from Dilbert [promote-my-site.com];
Re:Me (Score:2, Funny)
Have they turned it on? (Score:3, Funny)
All it probably just plays Rick Astley "Never Gonna Give You Up" in a loop.
Re:If they don't want them (Score:3, Funny)
Put it in the field and fly a Huey Gunship in the general vicinity.
If it runs, it's VC.
If it doesn't run, it's well disciplined VC.
I know what you're thinking ... "How do you shoot innocent laptops and desktops?"
It's easy - you just don't lead them as much!
Send 10 laptops or have bad luck for 7 years. (Score:5, Funny)
> Send a laptop to 10 people or you will have bad luck for 7 years. If you do send laptops to 10 people you will get your greatest wish!!
>
> A woman in Canada didn't send the laptops and now she is in prison for cheating on her taxes.
>
> A man in Kansas sent the 10 laptops and now has a new laptop!
>
> This is not a hoax or scam!! YOu HVAE TO SEND THIS!! 10 Laptops or something horrible will happens. Send it to all your friends!!!
> >
> > It's TRUE!! I got cancer when I didn't send the laptops, but then I sent them and now I have a million dollars!!!11
> >
> > Don't think this is a trick!! Just do it !1 Wjhat do you have to lose??
> >
> > Jack in Fredricksburgton
> >
> >
> > > I can't count the number of times I've sent out these kinds of Laptops and gotton NOTHIONG. But this is the real deal.
> > > You can't go wrong with this one. Think about it, you already got the laptop. You already have it...
> > > but dont' just accept the gift and not pass it on or your in for big troubles.
> > > >
> > > > Here is a free laptop. Pass this on to 10 friends and enjoy!
> > > >
> > > > Richard R.
Hackers (Score:5, Funny)
When they turn 'em on, does it show some distorted video of a guy telling them to play nice, and to enjoy the new laptop?
Re:Me (Score:3, Funny)
I'd like mine with an Argentinean girlfriend and some unexplained hiking trips, please.
Re:Me (Score:5, Funny)
Re:That might not be safe enough (Score:5, Funny)
On small (4-5 person) LAN parties back in the nineties, I knew a guy who shared his floppy drive under the name "porn". When somebody got too horny, their expectation of anonymity were ruined by the characteristic noise those drives make when they try to read from a non-existent floppy.
Re:That might not be safe enough (Score:4, Funny)
God would send an iPhone, not a laptop.
Get real.
Re:OLPG (Score:1, Funny)
More like "No Child Porn Left Behind".
"Five governors in a child pornography scandal after hidden files found on their laptops! News at 11."