The Hard Drive Is Inside the Computer 876
davidmwilliams writes "Those of us who work in technology have a jargon all of our very own. We know the difference between CPUs and GPUs, between SSD and HD, let alone HD and SDTV! Yet, our users are flat out calling everything 'the hard drive.' Why is it so?" As much as I hate to admit it, this particular thing drives me nuts. You don't call the auto shop and tell them that your engine is broken when your radio breaks!
IT Crowd (Score:5, Funny)
BOSS - What do you know about computers?
- Well, receiving emails, sending emails, clicking, double clicking, the internet... The list goes on...
BOSS - What is that under my table?
- The... hard... drive(?)...
BOSS - Of course! You got the job!
Just hard drive? (Score:5, Funny)
For my customers in a very rural, very southern town, it's a toss up between hard drive and: 'There's something wrong with the modem' "You mean you can't dial out?" "What?" "Dial out. You can't dial into your internet provider" "No. We got DSL. There's something wrong with the whole modem" "..."
Be thankful
Re:Servers... (Score:1, Funny)
Yep, I had that one... at home. The computer in my room is the one connected to the wireless router, so my computer is the "main server", apparently.
Linksys (Score:5, Funny)
To call the kettle black... (Score:5, Funny)
Well, sometimes IT professionals refer to people by their component parts too. For example:
"That dick from accounting just fubared the laser printer by feeding regular transparancies into it."
Re:IT Crowd (Score:5, Funny)
BOSS - What do you know about computers?
- Well, receiving emails, sending emails, clicking, double clicking, the internet... The list goes on...
BOSS - What is that under my table?
- Your ... secretary?
BOSS - Now you know what you need to do to get a job around here!
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
What's wrong about getting a load of spare parts when you offer him to get rid of his broken hard drive for free?
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Meh (Score:1, Funny)
Peanut butter in the keyboard, and soda stains in the "cupholder?"
Sure, but which web browser do you use? (Score:5, Funny)
So, I asked the group around the conference table, "Just so we know how to approach some of this, which web browser do you folks use here in the office?" The public relations director raised her hand and said, "Oh, that's me!"
She was the Official Web Browser in the office, and was the one to talk to about all such matters. What do you say at that point? So I said, "Excellent... it's helpful to have a designated contact point on the
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
The issue isn't even that they are calling the computer by the wrong name. The issue is that some people call the whole computer by a name that is incorrect but is a valid name for a single component that is part of the computer.
So what you're basically saying, when you get right down to it, at the end of the day, after all is said and done, by the by, that the issue is that they are calling the computer by the wrong name?
not everyone is a computer expert (Score:5, Funny)
I don't fault people for not knowing what the blinky bits are. What I fault is when they ask for advice and then don't fucking listen.
I shit you not, I actually had this conversation --
"Why did you buy Vista? We had this discussion last week and I told you you didn't need it, your computer couldn't run it, and you aren't missing anything."
"But I thought I needed Vista to be legal on my computer."
"No, for the fuck of Christ, no. Just make sure you don't open the box and you should be able to return it."
The next day.
"My little one opened the Vista and tried installing it. Now I don't have my stuff where I had my stuff."
"You never made backups of anything, did you?"
"No. The computer is as far back on the desk as it can go. How much further should I push it?"
Re:It seems that CPU is the furniture industry's t (Score:2, Funny)
The Good Old Days (Score:5, Funny)
I used to work at an ISP in the dirty dirty, back in the days when all we had were 8 external modems on a card table.
There was a cable cut that took out our T1 connection, and soon frantic calls from end users were coming in. For whatever reason, people just didn't accept that the "whole internet" could be inaccessible because our connection to it was severed.
We just started telling people that the internet was on fire. And for some reason, they would say "Oh, okay" and hang up.
That doesn't beat the time when a customer told me that the "computer inside his computer" was making funny noises. Looking back though, it sort of makes sense.
Re:Modem Box (Score:1, Funny)
Actually CPE is any device beyond the s/ni/d (subscriber network interface device, feel free to drop the first or last word)demarc or mpop. The technical (so I was taught)is a DSL Gateway. Calling it CPE is somewhat like saying you are going to get in your petroleum propelled vehicle go to the location where money is exchanged for goods and buy a product of bovine mammaries.
Re:Just hard drive? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:That will never be as aggravating as memory vs. (Score:5, Funny)
Re:When you call them (Score:3, Funny)
When I hear "X is broken", I typically assume it's a problem with 3D acceleration and display drivers.
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
Offer him $20. for the computer as scrap knowing that you can easily fix it and sell it. Then sell him one you just happen to have on the shelf for 30 times what you paid for it. This is America!
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
Dinner? Talk about inflation...
Friend-Geek service used to only cost you a beer!
*GeminiDomino, being used by women for techs since 1991*
I gave up on what is really the hard drive... (Score:3, Funny)
...and put all of my efforts into getting people to stop calling the projector "the powerpoint." "I need to borrow the laptop and powerpoint" BAH!
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
You know the old saying, when God gives you lemons, go find a better God.
Re:As a CFO once told me (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
You fuckers, always working for cheap!
Looking at someone's computer is a 6-pack of _good_ beer for me. Fixing it is negotiable, but usually involves a couple of nights with their wife!
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
Dinner? Talk about inflation...
Friend-Geek service used to only cost you a beer!
Inflation!
Have you seen the economy? It's driven me to drink, so due the my increasing tolerances, the price of "friendly" tech work has risen to bringing me a nice bottle of Vodka (though if she is cute, I might accept head).
I will share the vodka though.
Re:IT Crowd (Score:5, Funny)
The fun (or not so fun, IMO) part of our profession is that you can BS anyone into believing anything, as long as you stay ahead just an inch.
I used to work with a guy who, while working help desk, would convince people that it helped to rub their computers. They'd call with some problem, and he'd say, "Uh huh, ok. Have you tried rebooting it yet? Yes. Ok. Have you tried rubbing it?" If they asked why, he had some answer about how the friction would add a little heat to help things work, or else something about discharging static electricity. Really, he just liked the idea of someone rubbing their computer case to try to get it to work.
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
"In short, it's an unreliable mechanical device which will crack and take water in or just wear out or foul up at the worst possible time."
I know what a mustang is, I was asking about the distributor cap.
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
Just get a new case for it.
My grandmother gave her old computer to my uncle and bought a new one because it was "full". By "Full" - her email inbox was full. My uncle got a 2 year old computer for free.
Re:Meh (Score:2, Funny)
Gas, grass, or ass. Nobody gets her hard drive replaced for free.
Re:cutting-edge word definition? (Score:2, Funny)
It's not obscure and not elitist, it's just not American.
I'm... I'm confused.
Re:Meh (Score:5, Funny)
problem. Otherwise, all they hear is "the framjabulator snonked on the whooziwhats, so pay us money
Crap! That's just what my doctor said to me this morning! Is it serious???
Re:Meh (Score:4, Funny)
You fuckers, always working for cheap!
Looking at someone's computer is a 6-pack of _good_ beer for me. Fixing it is negotiable, but usually involves a couple of nights with their wife!
Be careful what you charge. You haven't seen some of my friends wives. They'd break their computer just to get you to take care of their wives...
Re:Meh (Score:2, Funny)
can you please explain what a record player is?
preferably using an analogy to a harddrive
ktkx
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
Looking at someone's computer is a 6-pack of _good_ beer for me. Fixing it is negotiable, but usually involves a couple of nights with their wife!
You can keep my wife.. the computer repair would be a bonus!
Re:Meh (Score:3, Funny)
what exactly are you up to with a donkey?
Re:cutting-edge word definition? (Score:3, Funny)
Go outside, have a fag, calm down, it'll be OK.
Re:The process is called "metonymy". (Score:3, Funny)
When we call soldiers "boots on the ground" that is metonymy.
Difference here is that the guy saying 'boots on the ground' realizes that there's a difference between the boot and the soldier, and knows what a boot is.
Re:Linksys (Score:1, Funny)