Two Black Hat Talks On Apple Security Cancelled 125
An anonymous reader writes "Two separate Apple security talks have been nixed at the last minute from next week's Black Hat security conference in Las Vegas. The Washington Post's Security Fix blog reports that Apple researcher Charles Edge was to present on flaws in Apple's FileVault encryption plan, but asked Black Hat to cancel the talk, citing confidentiality agreements with Apple. Then on Friday, Apple pulled its security engineering team out of a planned public discussion on the company's security practices — which would have been a first for Apple. 'Marketing got wind of it, and nobody at Apple is ever allowed to speak publicly about anything without marketing approval,' a Black Hat spokesman said."
Re:Marketing == American lawyers (Score:3, Funny)
preferred method should be beating to death by a stick.
My guess is you lack the upper body strength to pick up a stick.
I haven't been fucked like that since the NextCube (Score:4, Funny)
Rule #1: You do not talk about Apple flaws
Rule #2: You DO NOT talk about Apple flaws
Rule #3: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out we make him the CEO
Rule #4: Only two sentences to an argument
Rule #5: One argument at a time
Rule #6: No punch, no daiquiris
Rule #7: Cover-ups will go on as long as they have to
Rule #8: If this is your first night at Apple flaws, you HAVE to swallow
Re:Steve is not impressed (Score:3, Funny)
You are absolutely correct. It still sucks, it just sucks less.
I remember the Apple internal code name for their sound manager in or around 1989. It was called Barking Pumpkin and their motto was "it just sucks less."
Re:Shhh, if we don't admit anything (Score:4, Funny)
I wish there was an "incomprehensible grammar" mod....
One day in Vegas (Score:2, Funny)
Apple "No, it is perfectly secure"
Hacker" Seriously, duuuude, watch me hack your machine"
Apple "Can't be done, our software was blesses by the gods of Steve"
Hacker" Duude, Im not kidding Im in your machine, watch as I buy some child porn with your credit card"
Apple "Ha, all a figment of your imagination, our marketing department says we have the best operating system in existence"
FBI "excuse me sir I would like to talk to you regarding the purchase of illicit child porn"
Apple [while being dragged away] "I can assure you this has nothing to do with our operating system "
Hacker "hmm bummer, did that fed have a macbook, he looks like an anal sex type of guy to me heh"
[clickety clickety]
Re:Marketing? (Score:3, Funny)
The question is - do you know this to be true from personal industry experience, or are you just quoting Fight Club?
Damn, you forgot the first rule!