Bush Causes Cell Phone Ban

An anonymous reader writes "When President George Bush visits Sydney, Australia for the APEC Summit in September, all cell phone calls within the radius of a football field will be suppressed. The president's motorcade will be shadowed by a helicopter equipped with signal-jamming equipment. Terrorists have used mobile phones to detonate remote-controlled bombs in Iraq and elsewhere in the world." There are other ways to detonate explosives remotely. Doesn't seem like the smartest thing to let potential enemies know of such plans in advance.

Should read...

[Magada]

Title should read "Al-Qaeda scare causes widespread FUD in US and Aussie govts".

Nothing screams low key approach...

[LiquidCoooled]

Nothing screams low key approach like a helicopter blaring above.

Wasn't Bush given a mobile phone after 9/11?

How would they inform him if a problem occurs?

Helicopter

[MECC]

Will people be able to hear anything he says in the open with a helicopter overhead?

Oh wait that's right - it won't matter.

Helicopter?

[carpe_noctem]

The president's motorcade will be shadowed by a helicopter equipped with signal-jamming equipment.

I'm just hoping it's not black, for the sake of the tinfoil-hat crowd...

Re:What if they put a 20 seconds timer?

[nokilli]

Bush can't count that high.

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Re:Also, With Plants ...

[gEvil (beta)]

The article forgot to mention that the president's mere presence causes plants to wilt and die within a football field's length of the president.

You're thinking of Cheney...

911

[Anonymous Coward]

Help, i need the police! The presidents motorcade is approaching and I can see a sni.. hello? hello?!

Re:Cellphone bomb FUD news

[errxn]

What the terrorists should do is still rig a phone up to a bomb that detonates a second after phone signal is lost.

They'd better hope they're not using Sprint.

Re:A more useful application

[Anonymous Coward]

No way. Then theaters will have to pay millions upgrading audio systems to drown out the helicopters.

I say we just punch the fuckers.

Re:Should read...

[canUbeleiveIT]

Either that or "Yippee! Slashdot Editors Find Yet Another Lame Excuse to Bash Bush Administration"...from the 'Anything-we-can-get-our-hands-on' department.

Having Borderline Personality Disorder [aapel.org] is a prerequisite to being a /. editor. Apparently you didn't get the memo.

Re:Sure its not exclusive

[Anonymous Coward]

In other news, terrists switching to walkie-talkies.

I vote that, for his own protection, Bush be locked up in a bunker until January 20, 2009 (I think Cheney already pretty much does that of his own volition to start with). Seriously, pretty much nobody outside the US wants the guy around, and if he has to meet people, they can go to him or he can get Halliburton a cost-plus deal for a bitchin' videoconference setup.

American or Australian?

[eck011219]

Is that an American football field or an Australian Rules football field?

Seriously, though, can't we just use yards or meters? I don't know about other countries, but here in the U.S. we spend more mental energy envisioning big rotating or end-to-end football fields around or next to things.

Re:Should read...

[Architect_sasyr]

Pffft... Australian. I'm flat out getting my grammar correct, let alone finding the right position to put one of these... apostrophe things in the right spot...

We are, after all, children of convicts ;)

Re:Uhm..

[ray-auch]

So place the trigger phone half a football field ahead, and run some cable (or use wireless on a different frequency) to the bomb.

Only difficulty now is how big is a "football field" - is that american football, aussie rules, soccer, imperial or metric...

They have won!

[Anne_Nonymous]

When I can't talk on my phone while drinking a cup of coffee, and reading the paper, and watching TV, while driving to work in my SUV... the terrorists have won.

So America Wizened up...

[camperdave]

So America has finally wizened and have sent Bush to a penal colony. Good on ya, Mates!

Re:Nothing screams low key approach...

[kalirion]

No need to inform him in "real time", there's at least a 7 minute buffer.

Re:Should read...

[xENoLocO]

Remember. The terrorists are not winning.

*jedi hand movement*

Re:Should read...

[Anonymous Brave Guy]

So yeah, ten points for a great idea, but try and think like a terrorist, and then how would you defend against that.

<obligatory>

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” — George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., 5 August 2004

</obligatory>

Re:Helicopter?

[kurtis25]

A bright pink helicopter would be fun maybe tie-dye. Then everyone would try calling their friends and saying I'm looking at a bright pink helicopter but their phones won't work because the pink helicopter would be jamming their singles.

Re:Famous quote

[Anonymous Coward]

I guess the point of terrorism is to make a really big bang, not just commit "murder by numbers".

You people just don't get it, do you?

Terrorism has been redefined. It now means anything the Bush crowd says it means.

Re:"Movie plot" security

[JonathanR]

I don't know what everyone is banging on about. Everyone here knows that if you go Bush the mobile coverage is piss poor, no matter how good the propaganda from Telstra.

The one they would have loved to print

[gd23ka]

"When President George Bush visits Sydney, Australia for the APEC Summit in September, all dissent within the radius of a 5km of the visiting dignitary will be suppressed with immediate lethal force. During the days of the visit, curfew will begin one hour earlier and last one hour longer.

Kids! Parents! Let's give Mr. Bush a cheery welcome to Australia! Additional chocolate rations have been approved for minors under the age of 16 wishing to cheer President Bush, these will be available after each event. Adults will receive $10 for each cheering event, please contact your police department for further details."

Re:"Movie plot" security

[AdmiralWeirdbeard]

"PPS: How till this prevent suicide bombers, etc.?"

Homicide bombers, please.
When you dont use the Bush-approved propaganda buzzwords, the terrorists win.
And God kills kittens. Thousands of kittens each time.
Think of the kittens.

Re:Helicopter

[Chris Burke]

It really is spooky to look over your shoulder and see an attack helicopter floating a couple hundred yards away when you had to idea it was even there.

Especially when you aren't anywhere near a war zone or military base, and it happens repeatedly as you're leaving work or headed to the movies. What do you want from me, Mysterious Apache Pilot?!

Re:You think it would matter?

[1u3hr]

I doubt that calling 9-1-1 would get you anywhere before shit hit the fan.

Yes. Since the emergency number in Australia is 000.

Re:Should read...

[IllForgetMyNickSoonA]

I would have "uninvited" him, but nobody asks me! :-)

Re:Should read...

[BakaHoushi]

I never said the politicians were the sole blame for ruining public education. There's far too many to choose from (Creationists trying to turn science class into a Bible fight, teacher's unions, "Zero Tolerance" policies that punish the bullied, etc.) But politicians sure don't alleviate the problem at all. I guess this is part of the problem.

Now, for an ironic twist, an analogy of how society is NOT a car! Our modern society is NOT like a car. When a car breaks down, you can check to make sure each part is doing its... well, part. In the end, many parts may need replacing, but even if the whole engine breaks, the frame and the wheels are still usable. But in society, when problems arise, fixing and replacing parts is not viable, because no piece is broken, but rather a series of parts creates the problem. One can't find the source of the problem, and that makes it all that much more difficult to fix.

It's enough to drive you mad. I know it's working on me. I'm only 20 and I'm already planning for my first nervous breakdown.

And part of my point is I don't think these "safe" decisions are "safe" in the long term.
The "safe" decision to buy food from Pepsi prevents a lawsuit tomorrow, but it ruins the digestive tracts of kids over time, or, at least, can interfere with the abilities of children to function in classrooms (high sugar and carbs and low vitamins can make for some irritable kids. Think about how irritable some people get with excess caffeine.).

But of course, that's not the only source of the problem. Weight problems in America are also caused by many, many sources (including, of course, parents. But good luck improving our current batch.).

Basically, there IS no "safe" decision. The doctor today who pays outrageous fees for malpractice insurance is saved from a lawsuit next month, but a raise in prices causes more outrage, and makes more people likely to sue next year when their expensive surgery isn't perfect.

Hmmm... but I have noticed in every example I've given so far, a lot of the blame DOES go towards "fear of being sued." Maybe if we could do something about people suing over every little problem in life... hold on a sec... Uhhh... I just got a phone call. I'm being sued by the Bar Association for endangering their jobs. Damn.

Re:Should read...

[Johnny5000]

He's not the first president of the USA to travel abroad, you know, but for reasons of overblown security measures interfering with other people's lives in very unpleasant ways, he's most probably the least wellcome one.

I think he's probably the least welcome US president because he's generally acknowledged around the world to be a complete knob. I doubt the extra security precautions have much to do with it.