Heap Protection Mechanism 365
An anonymous reader writes "There's an article by Jason Miller on innovation in Unix that talks about OpenBSD's new heap protection mechanism as a major boon for security. Sounds like OpenBSD is going to be the first to support this new security method."
cool (Score:1, Funny)
My solution is slower, but 100% effective (Score:5, Funny)
When the application is finished with the memory, it sends a FAX to the local electronics recycling facility who sends out a tech to remove the DIMMs and melt them down into whatever.
Using this method of heap memory allocation (I call it "ACAlloc" for "Anonymous Coward Alloc" has been 100% effective and I have NEVER had a heap overflow exploit in any of my code.
Yes, it's slow, but I am secure.
What's next? (Score:4, Funny)
-Charlie
Apologies to the Black-Eyed Peas (Score:2, Funny)
Lookin' at my heap, heap
You can look but you can't touch it.
If you touch it, I'ma start some drama.
You don't want no drama.
[...]
My heap, my heap, my heap, my heap.
Microsoft Windows? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:OpenBSD at the cutting edge on security (Score:3, Funny)
I know it seems strange...but OpenBSD isn't a Linux distribution at all.
I know its hard to wrap head around. Its one of those things you just have to accept. In addition:
-deep down, cows are not people too. So you can eat 'em, I guess.
-neither are cats or dogs. So don't force them to wear clothing.
-neither is information. So it doesn't care about being free or anything else.
-"Windows" is somehow both an operating system and a Window manager. You're not supposed to consider them separate things (wierd, isn't it?)
-Wearing a tampon with wings will not give you the power of flight.
Hopefully I've cleared up a few issues for you.
Re:Hm... old technique? (Score:4, Funny)
Shhh!! I was waiting until everyone started using them before hitting them with my patent ;)
Heap protection? (Score:3, Funny)
Linux Had A Spec For This Ages Ago (Score:2, Funny)
VBLinux (Score:5, Funny)
For real security, don't use C.
I am rewriting Linux in Visual Basic 6.0.
I am going to call the distro VBLinux.
Re:What's next? (Score:3, Funny)
You *need* a cold shower? Hell, to me, that image *was* the equivalent of a cold shower!
Re:Slowdown? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:cool (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Unnecessary when using languages that solve thi (Score:4, Funny)
Let me know when you release your Haskell version of Sendmail, and I'll switch over immediately.
Re:Whatever happened to segmentation? (Score:5, Funny)
2005 self would counter with, "Yeah, the pointers will be bigger than they used to be, but you progam in high-level languages now, so you don't ever worry about that. It's the compiler's problem."
1987 Sloppy would say, "But I'm going go write a compiler!"
2005 Sloppy would say, "You fuckwit, you never got anywhere on that project. You barely even started it. Too much time fucking around with graphics and genetics."
1987 Sloppy would say, "But, but, it's not fair! Segmentation is an x86 thing. Everyone knows that in the future, we'll all be using 68k. 68k doesn't do segmentation."
2005 Sloppy would sigh.
1987 Sloppy would say, "Oh come on. There's no way people are still using x86 in the 21st century, or even in the 1990s. No fucking way."
2005 Sloppy would just shrug. There's nothing to do in a situation like this. There's nothing you can say. They'll never believe you.